Shonda Rhimes’s Balanced Life Mantra

The inspiring story of Shonda Rhimes’s struggle between success and family.

A powerful name in the world of TV

Hey, you’ve probably heard of Shonda Rhimes! She’s the one who created the blockbuster medical drama ‘Grey’s Anatomy.’

As the founder and CEO of Shondaland, she’s delivered hit series like ‘Scandal,’ ‘Inventing Anna,’ and ‘Bridgerton.’

But did you know that in addition to being such a media mogul, she’s also a mother of three? Her leadership skills in both business and family life have made her a symbol of multifaceted success.

A Struggle Behind Every Success

Recently speaking with Robin Roberts about the anniversary edition of her book ‘Year of Yes,’ Shonda revealed how difficult it is to juggle so many roles simultaneously.

She admitted that often, “when you succeed at work, you fail at home,” and vice versa.

You can’t have everything at once.

“The truth is, you can have everything, but not all at once,” Shonda said, citing an example she still remembers a decade later.

“I couldn’t go to Sandra Oh’s last night’s shoot on Grey’s Anatomy,” she explained. Sandra, who played Cristina Yang, left the beloved series in 2014 after 10 seasons. They had a deep “creative sisterhood.”

But instead of that crucial moment, Shonda felt it necessary to attend her daughter’s science fair.

The Pain of Decisions

Looking back, she admitted that such decisions are never easy—in those moments, “you tear yourself apart,” wondering if you made the right decision.

“You’ll think, ‘Oh my God, I’m doing the worst at work,’ or, ‘I can’t see what my child is doing, so I’m doing the worst at home,'” she said, highlighting the impossible expectations many working parents face.

Dealing with Pressure

She explained that this pressure often stems from the belief that success in one area of ​​life must come at the expense of another.

However, over time, Shonda has learned to confront these feelings directly. Instead of suppressing or dismissing them, she has made a conscious effort to talk openly about struggles.

The Mantra of Balance

“When I started saying, ‘If I’m succeeding in one, I’m failing in another,’ that’s when balance came into it,” she shared.

“It’s okay to drop the ball sometimes because you have to hold on tighter in the other.

That made me feel better, rather than pretending it doesn’t feel that way.”

The Importance of Self-Forgiveness

“It made me feel more comfortable, somehow,” she told Roberts. “And it allowed me to forgive myself for letting that happen.”

Family Expansion

Shonda became a mother in 2002 when she adopted her eldest daughter, Harper.

A decade later, she expanded her family by adopting her second daughter, Emerson. In 2013, her third daughter, Beckett, was born via surrogacy.

A New Incarnation of ‘Year of Yes’

On October 14, 2025, the 10th Anniversary Edition of Shonda’s ‘Year of Yes’ was published—offering readers a new and expanded version of her beloved bestseller.

The original book, first published in November 2015, chronicles Shonda’s journey from an introverted showrunner to a woman fully stepping into her power.

Maturity Ten Years Later

Now, with 10 more years of perspective, Shonda revisits that journey with deep honesty, humor, and wisdom.

The latest edition includes new stories and insights that show how her commitment to saying “yes” has shaped her life even a decade later.